Delight Live

We had such a gorgeous night tonight.  LO friends and teachers- oh I love these women!

I have to admit I was a bit nervous… back on my feet and talking about the book. I’m still a little uncomfortable talking about myself so much… Promoting the book, talking about how I wrote it, reading my own words out loud.. You see, I LOVE to share the beautiful words and thoughts of others. I do this well, all the time. But now, that I have to articulate my own view, opinion and clarify what I stand for and what the journey has been like.. I am actually finding it rather hard.. I woke up this morning to notes and emails and texts from people I love who were not able to be with us last night, but who were with my in spirit, in heart, in soul. And I think about the ripple effects that loving people ACTUALLY has on our life. That reaching out, showing up, saying yes and offering a hug or  a smile, HOW MUCH THAT REALLY MEANS.. and then how we pay it forward. I KNOW people left our event last night hugging their loved ones a bit tighter, waking up today refreshed with a sense of purpose and meaning that NATURALLY happens when we circle. When we take the time to get together live, move and breathe and go deep together- it HELPS US GET BACK ON TRACK or STAY THE COURSE.

oh my loves, I feel scared and excited about this all. I feel like I am opening my heart daily to the community and to supporting others and I’m also dong it without a roadmap, a guide or a final destination. Do you know that I like A PLAN? I mean, I REALLY do.

But this time, I will just keep saying yes.. in a way that feels GOOD. I wrote in my journal this morning, I will trust. I have no idea what lies ahead. Today, I will do good things and laugh and play and be quiet and to all the things on my life list. I will feel all the ways I want to feel and I will participate in activities that bring me and our family joy. And I will plan the week and move my body so that I don’t get STUCK in my head. The moment I drop into my breathe and feel my aliveness, I usually STOP thinking so much. With all the changes and unknowns, it’s a time when that imposter syndrome/ negative self talk likes to come by for a visit.. “WHO ARE YOU TO DO THIS WORK? WHAT DO YOU KNOW THAT IS WORTH SHARING? THIS WONT LAST! ” She says.. I know she is trying to protect me from getting hurt, she is trying to keep me safe and at status quo.. and I tell her SHHHH..

I pull out the journal, I light the candle. I feel my body. I re-calibrate the day, the feeling, the thought, the moment. And I see the small steps. The little things. AHHHH.. there I am. enjoying this. playing with it all. creating the kind of life I want. Okay, Okay. I got it.

I’m not really in control here at all. Yes, I see. In the meantime, having Saylor with me last night was amazing. I love that this is her childhood- hearing us talk about life, being with beautiful women…. DANCING! MOVING! BREATHING! YES!

I do this for me, I do this for her. I have never been a parent of an 8 year old girl before. I don’t know how this goes BUT I do know how to love and breathe and open my heart and do work in the world that is meaningful and interesting and I do know that I can show her love by taking care of myself. That I can model for her my humaness, my values and my integrity by being a person who lives and breathes from her heart, from her soul, from a place of yes- even when it’s SCARY or uncomfortable…

We made these special journals for our DELIGHT LIVE friends. I would love for you to have one, too.  email me pleasance@lilomm.com to learn how.

PLAYLIST from our Party

Breathe Again -Sara Bareilles

Shri Guru Charanam- Krishna Das

Hallelujah- Lindsey Sterling

Around The World- Daft Punk

Roslyn- Bon Iver & St. Vincent

Intro- The XX

 


simple

the simple life. I have been on a quest for this for a while now. WHY? Pulling back is a practice for me especially because I am someone who is motivated and capable. the alternative did not seem to be working. I am someone who has ALWAYS had a too full closet, fridge, purse, life. But there came a point when that did not feel good anymore. I felt like my life was speeding away from me….. my body told me in different ways (losing hair, adrenal fatigue, weight gain)- and it was up to me to listen. 

Here is what I notice when I simplify….

1. I feel calmer & peaceful more regularly and for a longer period of time. 

2. I experience a more in tune, in alignment exsistence and less up down and all around mood swings. 

2. I feel clarity and strength in my mind and in my body. 

3. I see my life. I see my children. I feel them. I listen. I hold. I touch. I am here.

4. I feel more joy & ease in all areas. 

5. I feel as if my days are full of the things I love & moments that are uniquely delicious to me, at this time in my life.

6. I feel my aliveless and my wholeness. I am sensitive to the changes in nature and my own rythms. I feel empowered by this awakening. 

7. When I have a big emotion or a painful loss I feel it. I have time and energy to mourn and experience grief & discomfort. This is HUGE as I believe it is also the access point to transformation and growth. Having time to experience hard things without shoving them down or numbing them is a reason I feel resilient, stronger and clearer about how big this gift of life is and its powerful preciousness. Nothing, NOTHING is taken for granted. 

When I began to let go of being superwoman, I began an investigation into my actual wants and desires for this life.

Now… it looks like this.   Having work time each day. I LOVE to work. BUT this had to be contained. I challenge myself to do 90mins on and then break. Some days I get another 90mins and others I stop. Depends on the day. 

Also, since I value our home and healthy food I have to make time to take care of these areas as well. If they are top on my values list, then they need to appear regularly in my schedule. 

Cleaning, planning, moving and resting are also on the list in order for me to have mental health and do all I want in the world. But if my schedule or the kids is too jammed- THIS GETS PUSHED out and I do not like how I feel…. since I run our family life ( for the most part) it is my job as the leader to keep my team members ( kids and hubby) thriving by routine, play and free time. We ALL get it in our house. 

I like to help my community and attend events 1-2x a week.  It used to be 5-6nights a week…. So I have trimmed that down and It feels great.

I have my next book mapped out & I am feeling called to get it in the world. So that is something I am marinating on. What can come in and what should go out. 

But today will not be lost on me. And I hope you pause and think of 1 area you can simplify. Here are some suggestions. 
Simple practices to help nourish you.

Yoga

lay on your back. hug your knees in. breath deeply. lengthen your legs towards the sky. spread your toes. breathe deeply. move with your breath for 5-10 minutes

Meditation

sit tall. long spine. lower chin. relax. breathe deeply. relax jaw. relax space between your eyes. inhale and exhale for a few minutes. give yourself a break. breathe for 5-10 minutes

journaling

sit down and free write for 2 minutes. I desire… I want to feel…. I am moved by…. I hear…..keep going with whatever comes up.

food

challenge yourself to make a meal this week with very few ingredients. take out all the bells and whistles. enjoy nature’s food as pure and clean and fresh as you can. prepare it with your heart. your kitchen is a sacred space. clean and organize it. treat your food with love. and take good care of what goes in. 

fun & play

plan something for YOURSELF that YOU enjoy, truly your own joy. a dance class. an art class. an alone date. something. do it now. put on calendar. something just for you. sometimes my fun/play is just a walk by myself in the woods or in a neighborhood I don’t know well. 

♥️

email me pleasance@lilomm.com with any issues/ challenges you are having in making simplicity a part of your life. I love having these conversations around how to make our lives work for us.

TRUST ME. I know it is hard. But then, it isn’t.  It is empowering and divinely beautiful to have the strength and intentionality to play & live on your own terms. 

2 books I love

Essentialism 

The Power of Less

This is from Mark Whitwell’s site.

Love this quote and the meaning…. so good. so true. 

What is PAUSE?

A few years ago I started consistently attending retreats.

I went to a few Business retreats, Women’s retreats  and a few Meditation retreats. What I noticed when I came back and shared my experience ( feeling refreshed, nourished and renewed) with others I always heard the same thing…

” I wish I could do that.”

“I can’t seem to get away.”

” I’m can’t  afford that.”

” That sounds wonderful, how can I find the time?!?”

So, I took this LONG list of all the reasons you CANNOT do it- and I removed the obstacles.

#1. You CAN. All ages, sizes, levels are welcome.

#2. Our day long retreat is RIGHT in Tenleytown, DC. Metro and bus accessible.

#3. We made it affordable for a 1 day retreat.

#4. The retreat takes place DURING school or work hours. Which means you DO have to take a mental health day from your life/job AND I encourage you to let go of the busy to do-ness of your day. BUT if you have school age kids- drop them off, come relax and then go pick them up.

What to expect.

*Loads of quiet. movement. stillness. community. peace.

*Simple, practical tools and techniques that you CAN take back to your life to integrate into your non- retreat like days.

Our next session is Thursday, May 19  9:30am-2:30pm located at IMCW 4708 Wisconsin Ave NW

Questions? pleasance@lilomm.com

Bring a journal and a lunch. ( or feel free to go out for lunch)

“Silence is a source of great strength.” – Lao Tzu

lets be clear…. 

Feeling inspired to clarify a bit around what I do and what I want to do more of… this is silly but was fun and from the heart.  And after working with women all week in my privates and groups- hope this gives you a feel for my perspective on having a yummy delicious life. 

Also- its super scary to put out short video clips that are not perfect and are from the soul. Telling the ego to shhhhh a bit. It’s the only way I will truly be able to serve- there is no perfect moment, perfect script, perfect lighting. 

 when you want to help people… the time IS NOW. 

Before it’s live- a love story.

Milo lays next to me, hugging my arm. Breath flows softly. I am catching up on emails and the last few to dos before I go offline from my regular life for 3 days and then a 4th to rest.

My book, Delight,  launches tomorrow and then I spend 2 days with other authors talking about our books and our biz. I can’t wait.

I have been home for a month on my surrender sabbatical. I spent lots and lots of time learning, listening, reading, resting, thinking and being. And now, It’s like I’m being shot out of a canon back into the world.

Today my doc said that I can drive and take my boot off at night to sleep. So I am getting some of my freedom back. But, the truth is I liked being home. I liked laying low, having no plans and creating my days, my life as I wanted.  THE PRACTICES WORKED to keep me calm and sane and present. There were hard days, hard moments. I went through them. I felt them. I came out. I did what I could. Cried when I needed to, worked when I had the energy, and had quite a nice time with all the silence. And spent a lot of time laughing and smiling and living.

I am thrilled to say that I think this sabbatical has given me profound insights on HOW TO MOVE FORWARD. What I want to do, take with me along the way. I have never been on my tush like that for a month. I have never taken time off like this before.  I hope my schedule is never that full again. I hope I continue to do meaningful work that lights me up for the rest of my life. And I hope I’m strong enough every time the work changes ( WHICH IT WILL)  to keep finding new ways of being. To keep creating. To keep going.

I learned that my beyond- amazing husband makes good coffee. That I love the light in my bedroom. That petting my dog for more than a minute is really nice. That I like to do 20 minutes of yoga RIGHT before the kids come home from school. Then I am truly welcoming and present for them when they rush in the door, tired and hungry.

I have a list of things/tools to film and write about for students based on feedback from classes and privates  that they need to help them go deeper with habits in wellness and learn more about yoga & meditation that is accessible to them. I can’t wait to get it going next week .

And, suddenly, I feel like it’s the night before my wedding. Tomorrow my book comes out. And I’m sitting here missing the studio. Missing the omm and the purple wall, the twinkle lights, the  oil/hippie smell, the gathering of my peeps… it was my comfort place. I am re-living all the memories and the moments and my heart aches to have it back, just one more time. But this is NOT a normal feeling for me, it’s just the one I have tonight- as I TRULY move forward. Change is hard. And I know these feelings are just coming up BC  tomorrow, I step into being a published author.

It feels like the night before the wedding when you are SO EXCITED to jump into your married life BUT your reminiscing about boyfriends from the past, wondering how they are and what they are up to and if you are making the right choice.. It’s like- I KNOW I want to be an author, share these teachings and this work, help people and create wellness AND I’m scared to do it all “on my own”. I have had the teachers and staff, the classes and students for so many years- and been known as someone who supports mothers, babies, children.. so as I evolve- what’s going to happen to the programs I love? I feel like I have been holding them tight, and close b/c I’m afraid. And tonight, it’s time to let them go.

Not goodbye forever, but I don’t see myself doing it the way I have before. AND if I am TRULY going to focus and serve my students and am clear about the work I want to do, and the financial stability I need to have ( a longer post coming up about this and the work I have been doing around mindset and $)  I can’t be leaking energy everywhere. I have to contain. I have to put up more boundaries than I have before. This is some serious shit for me. B/c it’s so much easier for me to run away, say YES, teach a million classes, give away my energy and my power and go into debt to serve others.. that’s really what I have practiced for  my life- over doing to prove my worth and value in so many ways, over and over and over… AND as I write about in the book, Delight. THAT TIME HAS PASSED. it’s over. it’s done. That’s an old story that has to change. And the time has come. Like a nervous bride,  I will show up tomorrow READY and AWAKE and PRESENT to celebrate and navigate all the changes with as much grace and compassion as I can.

“The minute I heard my first love story, I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along. ”
– Rumi