I got off track a bit.
I lost my mojo- I felt like I couldnt find a way out.
I had been sick with for 2 weeks… and I was less than thrilled. Feeling depleted, restless, wiped out and questioning- WHY???
I AM SO HEALTHY! I DO SO MUCH TO KEEP GOOD HEALTH, damn it!
FRUSTRATED & ANGRY.
I dont really thrive when this is how I wake up. Tired of resting and mindful that all my go ~to remedies were not able to cure this one.
I eventually put my tail between my legs and asked for help. When I felt better I was able to get back to my source of strength. I walked in the woods, alone quiet- getting strong.
Learning how to navigate my own energy & to roll on as things change all the time. The past few months I have been taking on more home responsibilities as my husband’s work demands have increased.
Its been quite a rocky yet incredibly beautiful time parenting. when I get to be here every. day. routine. schedule. dinner. dishes. dog. solid quality time, for sure.
and in some ways- that feels GOOD.
and in some ways, I want to run out the front door to paint, drink wine, go to France, frolic, travel & maybe fall in love again?
and then my heart would ACHE for the little bodies and for the unconditonalsupport my hubby gives me. we cant win.
always wanting more, different, better and then missing structure, simplicity and youth when it fades-