blessed.

this is my favorite day of the year.

a day we come together and notice all we have. thanksgiving is a yoga day. a connect with family day. a day to play & offer up our deepest gratitude.

today these things come to the top of my list.

1. the LO teachers & students.
there is no lilomm without devoted teachers and diligent students. our vibrant and diverse community is a light in my life. a place to connect in this crazy busy world. a place to slow down and breathe. the best part of the 4.5 years we have been open is that I carry with me all the teachers and students who are not physically with us here in DC anymore. What I feel now is the LO love expanding around our world. so that LO is NOT just a space.. its a feeling, a joy, an openness and a dedication to being engaged, inspired & connected.
it is this place that has given me a full integration of work/ life ” balance” and I notice daily the privilege in my life of whole- hearted living as a mother & as a community business owner.

2. Milo. This year, I am especially grateful for my biggest teacher- Milo. He is a spitfire of a soul. He is moody & adorable… sweet & then angry. Living with a 2.5 year old can be confusing and frustrating but this year… I reflect on how far we have come. A terribly difficult pregnancy and challenging powerful birth- this little dude was a “teacher” for me before I even laid eyes on him. He nursed all night long for his first 6 months and would not take a bottle. I was beyond tired and drained from how much he ate. Then I started loosing my hair and I did not stop. Was it his birth or all the nursing or not sleeping or was it the stress in my life being a mom of two and moving the studio… I will never know. But this is the moment I learned and started to practice self care.

last winter, little milo became sick all the time & he stopped gaining weight. from jan- june he had a number of asthma attacks and we spent a lot of time in & out of doctors & the ER. it was scary. it was exhausting. I felt lonely & lost as to how to navigate his health. eventually, he got the right nebulizer meds and for the past 8 months – our little guy gets twice a day steroids to keep him breathing “normally.”

this change of lifestyle has rocked my deepest beliefs about parenting..( long term meds& the ipad watching that occurs during a treatment) but I have practiced a deep letting go of how i WaNT things to be, how I EXPECT his life will go.. and I just stay with our life today. I look at the big picture and try not to get too annoyed with the way his little life has unfolded, thus far. I know he can grow out of this and that change is inevitable…. AND since I regularly practice “guilt free self care” I try not to let all the negative thoughts flood in & dominate my life. I notice them & send them away…

I am grateful for milo bc he continues to teach me life lessons that humble me, he shows me how different 2 kids can be, he is curious and strong, and he has so much life. I practice seeing him daily & watching who he becomes. He is a part of me & he stands strong as his own little dude.

3. my husband. 15 years together. mel has been my biggest fan. he supports me no matter what. when I change my career, when I jump into the fire, when I am too tired for him bc of all i give to others, he is steady. he is consistent. he is disciplined and he’s my rock. I need alone time on retreat. I fall asleep at 8pm on saturday nights and at every movie we watch. He & I have always been independent & he never picks at me for all the quirkiness… Mel & I continue to grow together OurMarriage is a gift that I am acknowledging today.

off to cook and connect…with a huge heart.

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This entry was posted in general.

3 comments on “blessed.

  1. owlgarden says:

    XO and Every day is a gift – even the bad days, which make the good days much more accessible (a mediocre day becomes a good day after a real bad day) I try to keep it in mind even though it seems like a stupid thing to think about when the day is just going kablooey.

  2. cathy muir says:

    And I am thankful today for the gift of Pleasance Chyna Lowengard-Darling-Silicki, for all that she was, is, and will become. My life is so much richer and blessed because of you.

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