while dealing with milo’s terribly difficult tantrum for the hundredth time this week. I realized something.
I have more space&love&patience than normal.
as he continues to demonstrate loud & violent tantrums of rage, I drop into my breathe and holding space for him.
this is a shift for me.
at home in DC amidst daily life and the crazy busy life we lead- I have no space for him. I yell at my hubby- I can be short with both kids. and sorry to say I take a lot of stress out on the dog.
and milos tantrums are BIG now that he is 2. they have been for a while. a few weeks ago I told my hubby I was not even sure if I could leave DC and move to the beach with them for the summer bc I didn’t know if I could handle him.
I was nervous about single parenting and how I would be able to deal with his difficult behavior. but something has happened over the past 10 days. I have slowed down. I have let go. I have surrendered to this amazing summer & in the meantime I am able to care for my 2 year old in a loving& compassionate way.
my big takeaway for today is
” the less I do, the more space I have to be”
I sink into the passion of the tantrums. I feel his breath and hold his body in close. I snuggle and console him. he is going through something I cannot fix it. I cannot change it. I can only hold space for what is his own pain. I cant take it on.
I’m okay with that & grateful to be his mom and of course the opportunity to awaken to this experience.